Loser

LizzieLou | blogging about blogging | Thursday, December 13th, 2018

Hey, guess what!? I totally failed NoBloPoMo!
I will now commence a series of rant about television shows that I watch.
Thank you.

My New Great Idea

LizzieLou | nablopomo | Tuesday, November 13th, 2018

… is to open a restaurant called “I Forget the Name of It”. That way, my sister will always know where it was she went for lunch, as long that that is the only place she goes.

Someone will have to make a movie about it too, also called “I Forget the Name of It”. Obviously. Then, because of it’s great success, it will also have to be made into a television or streaming series. “Hey! that new show is on Netflix, ‘I Forget the Name of I'” and it got really reviewed really well.

Goals. May 1993 (posted without comment)

LizzieLou | memoir,nablopomo | Monday, November 12th, 2018

1. give everything away
2. just get in the car and get lost for a few months
3. get married
4. MPH/PhD in medical anthropology
5. retire and go back to college for BFA
6. weight 149 pounds
7. shave head
8. Africa
9. Bangladesh
10. you get the point
11. speak fluent Spanish, German, Japanese, Russian, French, Swahili
12. visit every state
13. have a big O
14. be a (temporary) haircut
15. learn to SCUBA
16. hang glide
17. ride Great Adventure Batman Ride naked
18. walk on moon
19. be out and not care
20. stop getting attached to stupid things
21. stop hitting things with the bottom of my car
22. learn to ballroom dance
23. be financially independent SOON
24. go through Ropes
25. stop surface diving
26 .get published
27. write something really worth someone else’s time
28. (not in that order, necessarily)
29. die
30.

Correction

LizzieLou | blogging about blogging,nablopomo | Monday, November 12th, 2018

Really, it’s two posts because this one doesn’t count either.

Damn.

Missed a Post!

LizzieLou | nablopomo | Sunday, November 11th, 2018

Spent a lovely afternoon delighting in the company of my spouse. Then we went to the symphony. Like fancy pants (wearing casual pants)!

Day 3/7

LizzieLou | meme,nablopomo | Friday, November 9th, 2018

TGIF: #mylifeinblackandwhite — 7 days 7 photos — No humans. No explanations

They Had Been a Magnet all Evening (NSFW)

LizzieLou | nablopomo,reading | Thursday, November 8th, 2018

I have just discovered the joy of reading femslash fan fiction that has been run through Google Translate. Honestly, I wish I could just copy and past the whole thing here because it is incredibly confusing and mindnumbingly awful and just so hilarious. (I feel compelled to say this refers to the translation, as the story itself is actually kinda sweet.) Some phrases are really bad, but so bad they’re good. Here are some of those choice bits translated from Italian:

  • They walked up to the bedroom, never taking their lips off.
  • A moan more intense than the others exploded from the mouth of the blackberry, a sign that had reached the maximum pleasure.
  • She squeezed the sheets tightly when the other’s tongue seized, overbearingly, her femininity.
  • The heat that until recently was concentrated in a single point, exploded domineering making her moan without demeanor.
  • Her lips with impenetrable lust met with the lips of blondes.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go fan myself.

This RBF Has Whiskers

LizzieLou | nablopomo,pets | Wednesday, November 7th, 2018

Harriet is the cattiest cat we have ever had (maybe besides poor, dumb Monster). The reason her name is Harriet isn’t just because she’s hairy. She also looks like a Harriet. She looked like a little-bit-grumpy, slightly paranoid, certainly snobby, old lady named Harriet… as a KITTEN. Her previous person –what’s the name for that? it’s not her birth mama; it’s kinda her foster parents; or maybe her mother’s midwife? pimp? whatever– agreed that this was a fitting name for her.

I forget how Lolly found her (I was brought in to the whole process rather late), but soon we found ourselves in the car driving almost two hours out to some farm to fetch her. Then she screeched the entire ride back. (Harriet, not Lolly.) It was dark and raining. And screechy.

Her assimilation into the household went pretty smoothly. What’s not to like about a confident, curious fuzzball? Even our jaded old queens (that would be everyone except Franklin) were well behaved. Franklin and Harriet soon fell in love. They are now known as “The Longbodys” Mr. Franklin P. Longbody and his wife, Harriet. Their union was a whirlwind; no time to register at the PetCo or the Mud Bay Granary. Someone else fell in love too. Not immediately, because that love was unrequited at first, but after a while…

Lolly and Harriet sitting on the couch
S-m-o-o-c-h-i-n-g
First comes love, then comes Harriet taking up a full third of the bed as Lolly spoons her and I am all alone and cold on my remaining sliver of bed.

:::insert deadpan face emoji here:::

I try to give Harriet some love too. Her response to which is almost always a high-pitched, and rather nasal sounding, “Neeeeeeeewwwww.” Then she stares at me from across the room with her big eyes and her little pouty face. She is so totally and completely Lolly’s cat. So much so, that Harriet dismissively refers to me as: “Mommy’s Roommate.”

Day 2/7

LizzieLou | meme,nablopomo | Tuesday, November 6th, 2018

Again: #mylifeinblackandwhite — 7 days 7 photos — No humans. No explanations

Day 1/7

LizzieLou | meme,nablopomo | Monday, November 5th, 2018

Now this: #mylifeinblackandwhite — 7 days 7 photos — No humans. No explanations.

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